... I'm gonna be at Hillsongs Conference!
It's so exciting. I've wanted to go for a very long time now. Years. But there's always reasons why I couldn't. Mostly financial and since now, I actually am financially independent, I am able. I'm excited about what God's going to say to me through the conference. (A little scared too, but mostly excited.)
And I'm also excited about exploring a new city on my own. I haven't travelled to a new place on my own since backpacking around the US in 2005. I am going to the Conference with other people but I'm hanging around Sydney for a few days after on my own. Which reminds me that I still need to find accomodation for then...

One of my favouritest (yay, English-teacher me!) blogs is Jon Acuff's Stuff Christians Like. I've blogged about it before. One of his latest post is a quiz on singleness. It's hailarious. Try it!

The Surviving Church as a Single Scorecard
1. Your church doesn't have a singles ministry. = + 1 point
2. Your church has a singles ministry but it's combined with the college ministry which creates opportunities for conversations like this:
Student: "My roommate bought a microwave for our dorm room. I love being a Freshman!"
Single: "My 401K is underperforming." = +2 points
3. Your church has a singles ministry but it's a triad that combines college, single adults and divorce recovery. = + 3 points
4. Your church has a singles ministry but it's the dreaded quad, combining college, single adults, divorce recovery and retired widowers that refuse to move to Florida. = +4 points
5. Someone pays you the world's most backhanded compliment, "I just don't understand how someone as great as you isn't married yet." = +1 point
6. Someone told you, “If you stop looking for love you’ll find it.” 2 points for each time you’ve heard that.
7. At church, people give you weird looks if you refuse to sit in the “singles” section of the sanctuary. = +1 point
8. When people introduce you, they say, “This is Matt, my single friend.” = +2 points
9. When people introduce you they feel compelled to list out your accomplishments, “This is Sally, my single friend who owns her own home, drives a luxury sedan and has a very, very stable job.” = +3 points
10. Your friends that have been married for 15 minutes act like they suddenly don’t remember anything about dating and therefore can't give you any advice. “It’s been so long since I dated, things have changed so much. I’m just out of that whole scene.” + 2 points( Play On! )

I got at least 33 points! How many did you get?
I particularly identify with number 31 and 32. (See this other post on singleness.)

And one of my own:
41. When Jon Acuff blogs about singleness, you feel strangely compelled to repost his entire quiz. = +5 points
I guess that means I'm on 38! Woohoo!

So I'm still thinking about a name for my car. I've narrowed it down to two options. 1. Narci (as from before) and 2. Raceht (pronounced "Racket").

1. Narci
Narcicuss is a devastatingly beautiful man in Greek mythology. He had many suitors but despised them. Eventually, he falls in love with his own reflection in a pool. Echo, a nymph, is cursed to only repeat what other people say (hence where the English language derives the word from). She sees Nacicuss gazing at his own reflection in the pool and falls in love with him. He is too self-absorbed and eventually she dies, leaving only her voice behind.

2. Raceht
The name Raceht is derived from Patricia Hughes' The Sacred Rac, in which the rac (car, spelt backwards) is a "beast of burden" that is "revered" bu the Aus (USA, spelt backwards) society in the same way that people in India revere cows. It is essentially a satirical stab at the obession with cars (as well as anthropology).

A Hypothetical Conversation
Student: [trying to make conversation] So miss, what books are you reading right now?
Me: Oh, I'm currently reading two books, one on the English language and the other on punctuation.
Student: No, miss, I mean, what are you reading for fun?
Me: I am reading about English and punctuation for fun!
Student: erm...
Me: Really! They're really funny books, hilarious, in fact! Very informative too!
Student: Punctuation is fun?
Me: [excitedly] Yeah! Did you know that, for example, a man in 1916 was "hanged on a comma"? The judge decided that the law applied to the case because of the inclusion of a comma.
Student: Right... um, Twilight has punctuation.
Me: And did you know 'attract' and 'tractor' come from the same root word? Tract - to pull.
Student: [trying to change the subject] What about what you were reading before this?
Me: Well, I read one about the book publishing industry and a book about puns. My favourite pun of all is this - a good pun is like a good steak, a rare medium, well-done.
Student: [groan]

It is true, I am currently reading a book on punctuation (Eat, Shoots and Leaves by Lynn Truss) and one on the English language (Mother Tongue by Bill Bryson). Yes, I think they're hilarious. I before this, I read Casanova was a Book Lover by John Maxwell Hamillton (on the book industry) and Get Thee to the Punnery by Richard Lederer (on puns).

I think most normal people would think me mad. Ack! I think me mad. Methinks me mad. ('Methinks', by the way, is a proper English word. It is found in the dictionary.) I have morphed into one of those English creatures!

(I am up so 'late' because I don't have to be at school tomorrow. Professional development! I'm being sent on training. No kids! Yay!)

Today I embarked on my next career. It is very rewarding. Straight forward. I put in the work, I get the result. Very uncomplicated, unlike teaching. I work on what is dull. I see the point of it.
So what is this new career you ask? Pencil sharpening.
Yep.
That's my new career move. At least that's what I've felt like. With my kids sitting for national assessment exams today, I was inviliglating. My main job in this invilgiation room, however, ended up to be - sharpening 2B pencils. All I was doing was walking up and down the rows of students for almost 2 hours, swapping blunt pencils for sharp ones and then sharpening those blunt ones.
And this is going to happen all over again tomorrow. Oh. the. joy.

After not having blogged in forever, I wondered if I still had anything to say. Well, not just 'anything' because everyone has something to say but really, anything worthwhile. Something other people would want to read, and go, "Oh, that's right, I never thought about it like that before." Something significant.
Significant. As I ponder on the word, I realise that this is, not only the dilemna of my blog but the dilemna of my life. Significant. I want to be significant. I want a job that is significant. I want to write words that are significant. I want to do things that are significant. But underlying that desire for significance is the very real and raw fear that perhaps, just perhaps, I am not significant, that I am insignificant after all.
I know the textbook response to that statement that other Christians would give me. "Oh Marianne, but you are significant in God's eyes! I mean, He sent His Son to die for you, what could give you more significance than that?" Yes, I know that. And that's just the problem. I hope that last statement doesn't offend anyone. I don't mean at all to belittle the fact that Jesus gave His life for me on the Cross. I know, in my head, that I am significant in His eyes. I know it in my head but I don't always feel that in my heart. And I've always been a 'heart' person. I need to feel it. I guess that really sums up my rambiling. My plea today, and for as many days as I need is this: Lord, show me that You love me. Help me to feel significant in Your eyes. Help me to see that I don't have to look for it anywhere else but in You.

Very recently, I have become the proud owner of several new, shiny, pretty things.
1. Toyota Echo


2. Samsung F480


3. Compaq Notebook (in slightly older news)


I am particularly pleased about my car. As some of you know, I've been looking to buy one for ages and for me to finally do it is an achievement in itself. My first car, purchased with my own money, wholly mine! I'm busy thinking of a name for her. (How about an Echo named "Narcissus"? Narci for short?)
But even as I am parading my latest purchases, I can't help but think about an illustration from Schindler's List. At the end of the movie, Schindler, having saved thousands of Jews, breaks down upon receiving a token of appreciation from those he saved. As he cries out that he "could have saved more", he looks at his pin and sees that it is worth two more lives and that the very car he is escaping in is worth ten. He weeps and asks rhetorically, why he kept them. (See the clip below.)
A guest speaker at church had shown that clip to us. It unnerved me. So often I have taken my resources and material things for granted, as though they are God-given rights instead of seeing them for what they really are - tools for the extension of His Kingdom, tools of which I am a steward, and not an owner.

This post is prompted by a virtual gift someone sent me. (Check it out, I got a bear hug.) Thank you, anonymous gift-giver! My first livejournal v-gift! How exciting! (Yes, my life is boring.) Anyway, coming to the title of my post. The gift-giver said, "Come back soon, please." I'm assuming this means "come back to livejournal". Though it could also mean "come back to Singapore". But I don't think anyone would really be pleading with me to return to Singapore over my blog. So, I am coming back soon. I've just agreed to buy a laptop from one of my friends (no, it's not a Mac) and so very soon, I'll be fully technologically sound again! I can't believe I've gone for almost 2 months without. Soon, soon...!

Oh my! Indeed, oh my. It has been a month since my last post. Which also means it's been a month since I've been laptop-less. It's amazing I've managed to survive this long.
Nothing in particular to update except to say, yes, I am alive and no, I still do not have a laptop. (I'm thinking about crossing over to the dark side i.e. getting a Mac. But we'll see.) Toodles!

This is another one of those "I'm alive!" posts.
My laptop, however, is not so lucky and has gone a world beyond this one. As a result, I have been technologically disabled, hence the silence. It's really quite frustrating as I can't even check my email. Gmail is firewalled at work and I don't really want to be blogging at work. Even if it's during lunch. Come to think of it, LJ is probably firewalled too. And I haven't read any blogs for at least a month now. Sigh.

School has just begun and the descend into madness has now started.

Incidentally, if anyone would be willing to part with their laptop, I'll be a happy recipient.

That's all for now. Over and out.

Hello from the currently-not-so-sunny isle of Singapore! Yes, I am alive. And yes, it is raining. It is ironic that I'm in the most urbanised country in the world (rate of urbanisation here is 100%, I kid you not, I learnt that in Georgraphy class) and I haven't been able to email or blog. Well, that's what you get when you don't have an internet connection at home. And the neighbour's broadband is password protected. Not that I've tried hacking into it or anything...
Anyway, now that I've cleared that up, I'm also going to say that I am going to be here till the middle of January. And if I don't blog before then, again, I am still alive, just internet-less. But there are exciting days ahead before I head back to Perth. I'll be attending a friend's wedding, and of course there will be more meeting up of old friends and <i>food</i>! No trip to Singapore is complete without me eating the foods I miss. Which is of course, not the healthiest thing considering that there are more foods I miss than meals I have to eat. In the meantime, have a great new year everyone! And get back to work!

The Christmas season brings mixed emotions for me. Nostalgia of my childhood memories of warm family dinners are now mingled with the present reality of a distant family who can't even agree enough to set a date to celebrate together. The thought of Christmas morning gifts is spoilt with the memory of malls packed wall to wall with last-minute shoppers. The simple beauty of a nativity scene is filled with reminders of how much effort actually goes into every drama production. And so sometimes amidst the hullabaloo of Christmas, I feel like I lose myself. How am I remembering Jesus' birth amidst all this STUFF?

And then I think about the real reason for the season. For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only begotten Son. For God so loved the world that He gave... He gave. He gave so that I can give. So this year I am determined not to cave into the commercial trappings of Christmas. This Christmas I really just want to give. To give to the people that really matter to me. And to give gifts that really mean something. Not just something I picked out at the store after hunting for a few hours and getting desperate. Since the people I love already have everything that they need, I'm giving something else. I'm giving them the gift of giving. Through the World Vision Smiles programme, I've selected a gift for a family in need. On behalf of my loved ones, I purchase the gift. And then I get a card that informs them that the present that they would otherwise have received has gone on into the wide world. Some of the gifts include chickens, goats and even pigs! This, to me, is so much more significant than picking out yet another gift that will end up in the cupboard, never to see daylight. It reminds me of the song "And the gift goes on, the Father gave the Son. And the gift goes on, the Son gave the Spirit. And the gift goes on, the Spirit gave us life so we can give the gift of love. And the gift goes on...."

And wait, there's more!

I love the insanity of Lewis Carroll's Wonderland!
The day came and went very uneventfully. It has been the busiest birthday ever. Marking, marking and more marking. (They've just finished exams and we need to get reports in.) I had always been on holidays by the time by birthday rolled around but I guess that's not going to happen anymore since I've graduated to the working world.

It's a tough time in the year when reports and marks are due, after the exams have been taken. And the kids get friskier than normal. That's when this news report caught my eye: Florida Boy Arrested For Gas Attack. Now, before you think it's a story on terrorism, the subtitle reads, "12-year-old charged after deliberately 'breaking wind' in class". The report then goes on to detail that he was arrested for "disruption of a school function" because he "deliberately passed gas to disrupt the class" and he was also accused of "shutting off the computers of classmates". There's even a Sheriff's Office report attached to the news story.
It's bizarre! Why am I teaching in Perth when I can be teaching in Florida? Can somebody please arrest my kids?! Please!

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present .
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row .
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Lifted from an email sent to me by my head of department. And there's more where that came from.

Some kids just do not know, or have not been taught at home, the boundaries of appropriate/ inappropriate behaviour. I have kids who constantly ask me if I’ve eaten rice or noodles for lunch. This was after I had told them not to run around yelling, “Ni hao?” (a Mandarin Chinese greeting for “how are you”) every time they see me. (This reminds me of another similar incident from before I started teaching.) I take offence at these remarks because while they are not derogatory, they are fundamentally racist in nature. After all, I don’t badger any Italians I know if they’ve had pizza or pasta today. Nor do I ask any of the true-blue Australians (if we believe such a thing exists) if they’ve had a vegemite sandwich and wheetbix.
Conversely, I also have students who ask me to teach them phrases in Chinese, who are genuinely interested to learn about my culture and heritage. These questions I enthusiastically entertain as I know that there is no malice or intention to exclude and single me out on the basis of my ethnicity. It’s the manner in which it is done and intention behind it that matters. But how do I explain that to a bunch 14 year olds who think that everything is one big joke?
It’s not an issue about political correctness. Done in the right spirit, I am happy to accept jokes about Chinese or Singaporeans, etc. This is not. I resent being referred to as “the Asian English teacher” as if my ethnicity should matter in the assessment of my teaching ability. One class of students studied Rabbit Proof Fence and To Kill a Mockingbird this year. Some of them ‘get’ it and some of them still don’t. Some of them still think that racism is a myth. Yet every day I am made aware of the fact that it is well alive and kicking.

*The term "banana" in a Singapore context denotes a person of Chinese heritage who is metaphorically yellow on the outside but white on the inside. One who has been white-washed, often unable to speak Chinese well. I can't even use chopsticks the 'right' way so the term quite aptly describes me. See "But Mummy, Aren't We English?" and Phonecall with Dad for more.

Having applied for Permanent Residency at the beginning of March, I still had not heard anything about the progress of my application. But today, finally, I got an email in my inbox assigning a case officer to me and requesting for additional information. Finally! This may seem insignificant. But anyone doing migration paperwork will know that having any level of correspondence from the bureaucracy is practically a miracle! A prayer answered. I was starting to get worried as peers who applied around the same time were being granted their PRs and yet I hadn't even gotten a case officer. Additionally, some others had various complications with their applications and had to return to their home countries. I had begun to adopt the 'no news is good news' motto regarding my application. At least now I know that they're not rejecting my application (or not yet at least!)
So now there'll be more paperwork. But it's a step forward.

Two posts in one day. This must be a record since I began full-time teaching!

I am tired beyond belief.
A teacher's work is never done. I have still a mountain of marking to do. Administration to complete. Lesson planning. Parents to contact. So much to do before this term ends!
Sometimes I think I get so wrapped up in the things I need to do that the rest of the world occasionally ceases to exist.
I sat at Point Resolution today. Am I more resolved? I don't know. But I feel a little more at peace. If only just a little.

While in the midst of class today, I sneezed, which in itself is a wholly unremarkable event if not for the fact that blood started to flow out of my nose.
I had two girls who had come in late and I had motioned for them to come over and crossed the room, I was just about to speak when the momentous sneeze occurred. As the words, "Excuse me." departed from my lips, I felt a warm dribble from my nose. "How disgusting," I thought, "I have snot flowing while I'm speaking to students!" I raised my hand to stem the flow and it was when I took it away that I realised it was blood. Fresh, warm, bright red (oxygenated) blood. And it would not stop flowing! I imagine the two girls were too shocked to speak as they gawked at me dumbfounded. It's not often your teacher has blood flowing out of their nose as they try to speak to you. Nothing quite prepares you for what to say.
I looked around desperately for a box of tissues. To make matters worse, today of all days, I had swapped classrooms with another teacher. In my own room, I always have a box of tissues handy for my students' moments of dribble. One of the boys in front piqued, "Miss, there." gesturing to the few napkins that were miraculously resting on my computer's CPU. I grabbed them gratefully and held one to my nose.
While soaking two napkins, I explained to the girls what they had to do. Crisis averted. Or so I thought until another boy walked through the door, "Miss, did some one punch you?"
I groaned inwardly. Why did none of my monkeys tell me that I still have blood flowing out of my breathing apparatus?! More napkins.
When I've explained to him what to do, I finally get to go cower behind my desk in embarrassment, wetting my napkin with water from my bottle and cleaning up what I hoped was the last bit of blood.